CHANGE
I believe that there is change in everything. Change, not only for the bad, but for the good. The thing is, change happens for everybody, you can’t predict it, or even stop it, change happens. There are many quotes about change, none of them the full truth. It doesn’t always get better, it doesn’t always stay messy. Change is all about you as a person and how YOU handle it. Take it from me. When I was eleven, my dad and mom started to fight. Back then we used to live in my Bompa’s house, and he tried everything to try and make it better for me. He even sent us on a trip to Italy together, and it was going pretty well, but then change happened. Mom started getting too emotional, dad didn’t know how to speak his true emotions. Yes, I was stuck in the middle. It only got worse from there. I mean I was going into my tween and teen years where change lurks around every corner. My mom got a boyfriend named A.J. who she worked with. My dad got a girlfriend out of first instinct, look at that, here I am in the middle again. To make it worse, they both had little boys, a 1 year old and a three year old, and I felt like I was not in the middle again, but at the bottom of each of my parents lists. The worst thing for a child is to feel as if you are being replaced. Change was surrounding me, and my family. The story goes on from there, and is still bumpy for all of us. But that's not the only kind of change I have encountered. I have grown stronger from my family's adversity, I have learned, and cried. I don’t know what's going to happen next, whether it's good change, or bad. I do know my family will help me through it, even the ones who are not blood. I know that I should embrace the change, and I get where they’re coming from, but change can’t be controlled, it's hard to face that and move on quickly sometimes. Some move on faster than others, i'm not one of those people, at fourteen, i'm still in that same situation. I have embraced some change more than others, others more than me. Sometimes that fantasy of my parents getting back together shields me from the truth. I believe that change is everywhere, that change cannot be stopped and that everyone has to overcome change is the best way they can, even if it's a baby step. Being a target of change, you really know to not expect anything, so when something comes along, don’t expect it to be the same next week. Take this one last thing from me please, I missed the best part of my childhood because I didn’t know what to do with the change given to me, don’t do the same.
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June 2021
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