On the dark side of the moon where the real me resides,
I feel everything I've hidden come back to life. The mirror beckons me to come watch, as every last thread is cut apart. Control is lost and hands shake, breath no longer works and my knees give out of their locked in place. Hands that touched where they shouldn't have, death which came when I needed someone the most.Empty bottles of the drink I despise, loud voices yelling about who I can and can't love. Even more than that, I come back to the camera of my phone and watch as I sit all alone. I ran from help, I left the scene, it was only time for my emotions to intervene. I'm sorry I don't want to be happy, I'm sorry I can't be on top. These working hands that lie ¨Its for the betterment of this world not because I can't stop¨ Why do I lie? What started out as innocence quickly was squashed by thunder and rain of this cynical world. So now all I can do is sit alone, on top of the world but feeling below. I am what so many people hunger for but how can you tell such spry young faces that everything they desire will leave them on the dark side of the moon where one can never run the same races. We'll never meet in the middle, we'll always be in disarray, what one earns another one is disconcerted.
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June 2021
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